Maryanne and Tommy Pilling defied the odds. Told their relationship would not last, the couple went on to celebrate 23 wedding anniversaries and enjoyed 25 years of marriage before Tommy’s passing in 2021.
Advertisement
The couple made history in 1995 when they became the first people with Down syndrome in the UK to marry. Their relationship gained national and international attention, and by their 22nd anniversary in 2017, their love story had been widely shared as an inspiration to families of children with Down syndrome.
Advertisement
While many parents often express concerns about their children with Down syndrome falling in love or starting a family, Maryanne and Tommy’s marriage offered hope and encouragement. Their lives were documented on a Facebook page run by Maryanne’s sister, Lindi Newman, who shared their everyday moments, from outings to the aquarium and coffee dates to birthday celebrations.
Maryanne once described her wedding as “the best day of my life,” adding that she “didn’t have to think twice” when Tommy proposed. Her mother, who supported the marriage wholeheartedly, recalled that Maryanne had always dreamed of a traditional white wedding. As soon as Tommy proposed, she began preparations for a 250-guest celebration.
Advertisement
“Tommy and I never argue. I love my husband very much. He is my best friend,” Maryanne said in an interview.
Though some members of the public initially viewed their marriage as unusual, their story resonated globally. “Some people stare, assuming people with Down syndrome cannot marry,” explained Lindi. “But we also receive countless messages from people who are inspired by them.”
The couple lived independently, supported by family members living next door. Lindi described their bond as “pure,” noting: “What kept their marriage so strong was that there was never a hidden agenda. They loved each other with their whole hearts and were honest with one another.”
On January 1, 2021, Tommy died at the age of 62 after being diagnosed with dementia and later testing positive for COVID-19 while in hospital.
Announcing his death, Lindi paid tribute on Facebook:
“Our beautiful Tommy passed peacefully on 01.01.21 at 1:40am after a battle with COVID pneumonia… Marriage made you my brother-in-law, love made you my brother. Forever our Tommy.”
Advertisement
Maryanne and Tommy’s story continues to be shared as a reminder that love, commitment, and happiness are possible for people with Down syndrome, offering encouragement to families across the world.
Parents find their own ways to support their kids with down syndrome, especially if they are in love, just like these two mothers who arranged a surprise reunion for their kids at the airport, or when a father tweets about how 'proudest' he is when his daughter with down-syndrome graduates from college.
Our stories are for those days when you’ve lost a little faith in people. These feel-good, wholesome stories are here to remind you that kindness still exists, and that small moments can make the biggest difference. If you’d like more of these reminders, you can subscribe and never miss a story.
Send story ideas, facts, correction, or kind thoughts to hello@nostalgicgrandma.com.